


Believe

by froxyn



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-07-19
Updated: 2008-07-19
Packaged: 2017-10-08 18:25:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/78288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/froxyn/pseuds/froxyn





	Believe

Title: Believe  
Author: Froxyn  
Rating: FRAO   
Pairing: Buffy/Giles  
Timeline: AU…nothing to distinguish any season.  
Synopsis: Buffy wants to protect Giles…but goes about it in a strange way.  
Author's Notes: Thank you [wyvernwolf](http://wyvernwolf.livejournal.com)!

 

Giles stared in disbelief, unable to form any words. Buffy sat in front of him, her eyes lowered as she twisted her hands in her lap. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he willed his racing heart to calm.

Of all the things he had expected her to say, 'I don't think this is going to work' wasn't one of them. They had been together for nearly six months…the happiest six months of Giles' life. He thought she had been happy as well and her nervously spoken statement had caught him completely off-guard.

"Buffy…" He whispered, his voice trembling.

"I…" She shook her head and pushed herself up from the coffee table on which she had been sitting. "I should…go."

He felt a dull ache in his chest, standing as she walked towards the door. Her hand was on the doorknob when the words finally spilled from his lips.

"Did you ever love me?"

"More than you know." She turned her head and looked at him, tears rolling down her face. "I've always loved you, Giles. And I always will."

As she stepped out into the sunlight and closed the door behind her, Giles was sure that the sound of his heart breaking could have been clearly heard…had anyone been standing in the room with him. He pulled the small velvet box out of his pocket and gripped it tightly in his hand.

As he realized that he had never felt more alone than he did at this very moment, a tear spilled onto his cheek. He dropped the box onto the coffee table and made his way to the liquor cabinet.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Willow's mouth dropped open as she stared into Buffy's red eyes. "You broke up with him?"

Buffy wiped the moisture from her face as she nodded miserably. "I didn't know what else to do."

"What? Buffy…you love him, I know you do."

Buffy's tears started again and she sniffled. "I really do. God, Will…I love him so much. This is killing me."

"So…you break up with him? I don't get it, Buffy…what's really going on?"

"I'm the Slayer." She forced out as she fought back the sobs.

"Yeah…and he's the Watcher. He understands your calling better than anyone, probably even better than you." Willow replied, confusion in her tone.

"Chances are…I'll die young. I can't do that to him. I…" Buffy averted her eyes from Willow's and stared out the window. "It's…too much."

Willow shook her head in disbelief. "There has to be something more. I've seen you two the past few months…_we've_ seen…"

Buffy sighed sadly, wiping the fresh tears from her eyes. "Will, please…I can't."

"Buffy, he – "

Buffy interrupted her quickly. "I did this for him. I'm trying to protect him…"

"By breaking up with him? Do you honestly think he'll stop loving you because you end your relationship?"

Buffy took a deep breath and turned her watery eyes to her friend, repeating her earlier statement. "I didn't know what else to do."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Xander opened Giles' front door and walked in, a bright smile on his face and a box of doughnuts under his arm. "Hey, G-Man, what's the what for demony goodness today?"

Giles rolled his eyes and tossed back his drink, quickly refilling his tumbler. He briefly considered forgoing the glass, but discarded that thought…after all, he still retained a small amount of pride.

"Nothing that I'm aware of." Giles replied in a clipped tone.

Xander narrowed his eyes as he put the box on the table. "Um…a little early for that, isn't it?"

"Depends on your definition of early, I suppose."

"Uh-huh." Xander answered uncertainly as he looked around. "Where's Buffy?"

Giles swallowed the amber liquid and stood up, walking unsteadily towards the cabinet. "How should I know?"

"Because she's always here…" The young man replied, worry beginning to seep into his voice.

"Not anymore, apparently." Giles huffed and opened a fresh bottle of scotch, filling his glass once more.

Xander swallowed and gestured towards the bottle. "How much have you had, Giles?"

Giles looked at Xander with eyes full of sadness. "Not enough…as I'm still conscious. Why are you here, Xander?"

Xander neatly sidestepped the question with one of his own. "What's going on?"

"Buffy loves me. Always has, always will." Giles smiled drunkenly.

Xander chuckled softly. "Well, yeah…that's not a big secret there, Giles."

Giles' smile faded, his eyes glistening. "She also thinks this isn't going to work."

Xander narrowed his eyes. "What isn't going to work?"

Giles gestured around the room, scotch sloshing over the side of his glass. "This…us…"

"What?" The young man whispered.

A single tear made its presence known on Giles' face. "She's left me. She loves me, but…apparently not enough to stay."

Xander swallowed and glanced at the coffee table, his eyes quickly noticing the blue velvet box. "Giles?"

Giles followed Xander's line of vision, pointing towards the box with his glass. "Oh, that. Take it. Give it to Anya…tell her you spent days searching for the right one. I've no use for it now."

Xander opened the hinged lid and stared at the diamond ring resting inside. "Jesus…"

Giles took a drink and turned towards the window. "Take it when you leave. I'm rather sure I can't deal with it being here at the moment."

"Giles, I…"

Giles interrupted him softly. "I apologize, Xander. But, I'm not in the right frame of mind for visitors. Thank you for coming, but…please leave now."

Xander slipped the box into his pocket and stared at the broken-hearted man for a moment. "I'll come back later, okay?"

Giles said nothing, simply took another sip from the glass and stared out the window.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Willow's bedroom door slammed open and Xander ran in, startling both Willow and Buffy.

"Will…have you seen Buff – " He stopped in mid-question and stared at the teary blonde sitting on Willow's bed. "Guess you have."

"What's going on, Xander?" Willow asked quietly.

"Oh, nothing. Except that Giles is drunk and giving away jewellery."

Buffy narrowed her eyes. "What?"

Xander pulled the box out of his pocket and tossed it onto the bed. "You couldn't have broken his heart _before_ he proposed?"

"What?" Buffy repeated in a barely audible whisper.

"Apparently he spent days searching for the perfect one." He watched as Buffy picked up the box with trembling hands and opened it. "Said he didn't have a need for it now and told me to give it to Anya. What the hell were you thinking, Buffy?"

A new onslaught of tears consumed Buffy as she carefully plucked the ring from the box. She closed her hand around the ring and lay down on the bed, curling her body and holding her hand to her chest. As her body violently shook with her sobs, Xander met Willow's eyes.

"Did I miss something?"

Willow glanced at Buffy and nodded. "I think we're both missing something. Do you think you could get Giles over here?"

Xander shook his head slowly. "He's plastered, Will. He was a quarter way through his second bottle of scotch when I was there. He probably wouldn't even be conscious by now."

Willow took a deep breath. "Then we go there. Do you think you can carry Buffy?"

Xander nodded silently as Buffy's sobs continued.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Buffy had quietened somewhat on the drive to Giles' apartment. She had said very little, but the sobs had dissipated for the time being. Her hand remained curled around the ring that Xander had brought with him.

Giles looked up with unfocused eyes as Xander opened the door. "Back so soon?"

Xander nodded and offered a gentle smile. "Yeah…brought someone with me though."

"Great." Giles mumbled as he lifted his seemingly never empty glass.

When Buffy walked through the door with Willow, the tumbler fell from his hand, spilling scotch on his jeans before shattering on the floor at his feet.

"I'm in no condition to research, Xander." Giles stated, his speech slurred by the alcohol.

Willow leaned into Buffy, whispering softly in her ear. "Talk to him, Buffy. Tell him everything. And I mean…everything. You may not want to tell me what's going on, but…he deserves to know the truth."

Buffy nodded numbly as Willow gently pushed her towards Giles. Giles stared at Buffy for a moment before looking away.

"Are you here to see how much more damage you can inflict?"

Buffy looked up quickly, shaking her head as she registered the pain in his voice. "No…God, no. Giles…"

Giles cleared his throat. "You, uh…you'll need a Watcher. Once I've sobered, I'll make the call…"

Buffy's eyes widened. "You're leaving?"

"How can I not?" He whispered, lowering his eyes. "I love you. I've shared…everything with you. Given you everything I have. I wish it had been enough. I wish you could love me as I love you."

"I do." She protested quickly, taking another step towards him. "I do, Giles."

"No." He shook his head sadly. "No…because if you did, you wouldn't have walked away from me. You _couldn't_ have walked away from me. I know…because I can't walk away from you."

Buffy's eyes narrowed as she worked her mind around his words. Her soft tone held no anger, but her voice was laden with confusion. "You can't walk away from me, but you can leave Sunnydale?"

Giles chuckled, but it held no humour. "Drunken logic, it makes sense in my head. Not so much when spoken aloud."

Not knowing how to respond, Buffy blurted out the first thing that came into her mind. "I'm having dreams."

Xander and Willow exchanged a quick glance before moving to the kitchen to give them some semblance of privacy.

"Dreams? Or…nightmares?" Giles asked warily.

"Nightmares." She whispered.

Giles took a deep breath, concern flickering in his eyes. "Prophetic?"

Buffy nodded and exhaled. "Same dream, over and over. Yellow, scaly demon ripping my heart out."

Giles stood and stumbled towards her. "Buffy…"

Her eyes filled with tears once more. "I…I love you so much, Giles. I only wanted to protect you from…"

"Your death?" Giles asked softly. Giles shook his head and leaned against the dining table. "Nothing can protect me from that. I hope to die before you, but I know that isn't a probability. Our lives are dangerous, Buffy. We have no guarantees…and yet, I gave you my heart."

Buffy sniffled. "And I broke it."

He hesitated for a moment. "You can mend it, if you so choose."

Giles stared at her and then cleared his throat. "How many times have you had the dream?"

"Um…seven?"

"Why didn't you say anything?" His voice rose as his panic grew. "Buffy, I can't bloody well help you if you keep me in the dark!"

"If I had told you, you wouldn't have let me face him!" She countered loudly.

"We'd find another way, Buffy. That's what we do. You have a prophecy dream, we find a way to right the world without you getting hurt. I can't do that if I don't know about it! How can – "

He stopped suddenly, her words finally sinking in. He tilted his head and looked into her watery eyes.

"What do you mean I wouldn't have let you face him? I've never told you not to face a demon. I know your duty as well as my own. I know what you have to do. But…it's my job to try to protect you as best I can. We've averted apocalypses and prophetic dreams before."

When a tear fell from her eye, he took a step towards her. "What's so different about this demon?"

She shook her head slowly. "It's not the demon, Giles. It's me."

"I…I don't understand. What do you me – "

"I think I'm pregnant." She interrupted him with a soft whisper.

"What?"

"What?" Xander echoed as he stared at them from the kitchen, only to be elbowed by Willow.

"I…I'm not sure. I'm late…by a few days. It could be nothing. But, it could be…I could be…"

"Pregnant?" He whispered as he reached out and took her hand. His eyes were focused by a sudden sobriety, though his speech remained slightly slurred.

"Yeah. But, maybe not. I don't know. I…haven't taken a test or been to the doctor or anything."

"Why not?" Xander asked automatically.

Willow shoved him out of the kitchen and towards the bathroom, realizing that their current position wasn't very conducive to giving privacy. "Shut up, Xander!"

Giles swallowed as he stared at Buffy. "Fairly reasonable question he just asked. Why haven't you?"

"I have an appointment tomorrow. And…I don't trust the home tests." She answered quietly. "Aren't you going to ask me how?"

He narrowed his eyes. "I know how babies are conceived, Buffy."

"Yeah, I know that. But…I'm on the pill."

"Mm. And the only form of birth control that is one hundred percent effective is abstinence."

He looked into her eyes for a moment longer and then released her hand and stumbled backwards, shaking his head as he turned towards the bookshelf. "Tell me about the demon. I need more than yellow, scaly, and having the ability to rip a heart from a human chest."

"Giles?" Buffy whispered, confused by his sudden change of behaviour.

Giles pulled a few books from the shelf and threw them onto the table. "The demon, Buffy. Tell me."

She carefully made her way to his side, placing her hand on his back. When he jerked away from her touch, she swallowed nervously and dropped her hand back to her side.

"Giles, look…I know we didn't plan this and…I may not even be pregnant. But…"

He turned and looked into her eyes, his darkened by a myriad of emotions. "You think I'm upset because you might be pregnant?"

When she nodded, he shook his head. "No. The fact that you might be pregnant makes me happy."

"You don't look happy." Her voice quivered lightly.

"I'm not." He stated simply and pulled out a chair at the table, sitting down heavily and opening one of the books. "Now tell me about the demon."

"Giles…"

He slammed his hand down on the table, anger pouring into his voice. "Tell me about the fucking demon, Buffy!"

"What's wrong, Giles?" Buffy asked softly, fear evident in her voice.

Giles stared at her for a moment. "Nothing. Nothing at all. Except for you telling me nothing. Nothing about dreams, nothing about a baby…nothing! Instead, you leave me…you tell me you love me and then you leave me. Presumably to go off to face this demon who will rip your heart out…and leave me with nothing. No wife, no child…nothing! You'd rather allow yourself and our child to die than to tell me anything so that I can try to help you!"

He shook his head angrily and returned his gaze to the books. "Now tell me about the demon."

Buffy took a deep breath and uncurled her hand, gently placing the ring on the book in front of Giles. "Were you really going to propose to me?"

Giles stared at the ring before covering it with a trembling hand, his voice softening as he spoke. "Does it really matter now?"

"Giles, please…"

He looked up, tears blurring his vision. "Let's deal with the demon first." He picked up the ring and slid it into his pocket. "We can discuss the other matter later."

"I…" She began, but stopped when he quickly shook his head.

"Buffy…I'm drunk. I've just found out that the woman I love has been having prophetic dreams of her death and she may or may not be pregnant with my child. This is not the time to discuss any plans I might have for our future, if we even have one together. Right now I have to find a way to keep you alive. And for that to happen, I need you to tell me about the demon."

Buffy nodded slowly. She glanced towards Willow and Xander as they made their way back down the hall, the sound of Giles yelling drawing them from the bathroom. Giles looked at them as they sat down across from him.

"We're here to help." Xander offered sincerely.

Giles gave him a quick nod and then turned back to Buffy. "The demon, Buffy."

Buffy sat down next to Giles and began describing her dream in graphic detail. It took all of Giles' self-control to not throw up as he listened.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Buffy glanced at Giles and sighed softly as she watched him rub his temple as he flipped through the pages of the book in front of him. Xander and Willow were also deep into research mode. She stood quietly and walked down the hallway to the bathroom.

She stared at her reflection in the mirror on the medicine cabinet, shocked at how tired she looked. Crying always took a lot out of her…and she had definitely done her fair share of crying today.

She opened the cabinet and searched through the various medicine bottles. The mass variety of painkillers in his home still unnerved her. But different doctors prescribe different things and Giles rarely saw the same doctor twice in the emergency room.

She found the bottle she was looking for and shook two capsules into her hand. She took a deep breath and closed the cabinet, her eyes darting to the reflection of Giles' robe hanging on the back of the door. She moved to the door and ran her hand over the soft cloth, exhaling deeply and refusing to let the tears fall again.

Before she could dwell on the current mess that was her love life, she rushed out of the bathroom and headed back to the living room, making a quick detour into the kitchen for a bottle of water. She reclaimed her seat and placed the water on the table. Giles looked up as she turned his hand over and dropped two capsules into his palm.

"Thank you." He whispered, quickly popping the pills into his mouth.

"Is it just the alcohol?" She asked, referring to his headache.

"I'm not sure. Probably."

She was quiet for a second and then placed her hand on his thigh. "I'm sorry, Giles."

He exhaled slowly and met her eyes. "You should get some rest."

She bit her bottom lip, understanding that he wasn't ready for an apology. She stood back up and reached out to touch him, stopping just before her fingers touched his shoulder. She sighed and dropped her hand back to her side.

"Please don't hate me, Giles." She whispered as she leaned down and kissed the temple he'd been rubbing vigorously. "I love you."

Before he could respond, she hurriedly made her way up the stairs. He gently touched the spot where she had kissed him and exhaled shakily. Willow reached across the table and touched the back of his hand to get his attention.

When he met her eyes, she offered him a gentle smile. "She does love you Giles. I understand you're angry, and I get that…I really do. But, she thought she was protecting you."

"I know." He answered quietly and looked towards the loft. "I don't want her to think I hate her. What I'm feeling is far from hate." He cleared his throat and returned his gaze to Willow. "And…I'm more hurt than angry."

"Maybe you should go up and talk to her." She suggested softly.

He shook his head and looked back down at the book. "She needs to rest."

Xander looked up and tapped his fingers on the table. "I normally keep quiet in these kinds of situations because I really don't know what to say. But, one thing I do know…she's not going to be able to rest. Not until you at least talk to her."

Giles ran his hand through his hair. "I'm not even sure of what to say."

Xander leaned forward, catching Giles' eyes. "Do you love her?"

"More than anything." Giles answered without hesitation.

The young man smiled and gestured to the loft. "Good place to start, I think."

Willow nodded in agreement. "And we'll keep searching for the demon. I think I might be on to something here…"

Giles met her eyes and easily recognized her determination. He pushed back his chair and, after a brief pause, stood. Taking a deep breath, he walked to the stairs. After a moment's hesitation and without another word spoken, he began his ascent.

* * *

Buffy heard his footsteps on the stairs. She sat up and rested her back against the headboard, folding her hands in her lap. She took a nervous breath as he stepped into the room.

"Hello." He spoke softly.

"Hey." She replied, staring at her hands.

"I, uh…" He cleared his throat and took a step forward. "Buffy…I don't hate you. I could never hate you."

Her lip quivered as she fought her tears. "But?"

"I'm hurt." He moved closer and sat down on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor. "It hurts me that you wouldn't say anything. I…I understand you were trying to protect me, but…you can't. Not in this."

He swallowed and turned his head to look at her. She was still staring at her hands, but he knew she was on the verge of tears once more.

"Buffy, look at me." After a moment, she complied with his request and he continued softly. "If you want to end our relationship, don't use this as an excuse. We both knew the risks, and discussed them at length, before we started this. If you honestly think this isn't going to work between us…or if you…if you don't love me…then by all means, break my heart. But, break it cleanly."

He watched a salty bead of moisture roll down her face as his eyes welled with tears.

"Don't…don't tell me you love me…that you've always loved me and that you always will. Don't tell me that and then leave me."

"I didn't want to break up with you." She whispered as another tear spilled onto her cheek.

"But you did. And…I think that was the most painful dissolution of a relationship that I've ever experienced. Past lovers have hurt me, yes. But…not one of them spoke of their undying love for me as they walked away."

She lowered her eyes and inhaled shakily. "Did I destroy everything we have? Has our relationship been completely ruined?"

"I don't know." He answered sadly. "That depends on you. And…you need time to think, Buffy."

He shook his head quickly as she started to protest. "No, Buffy. _I_ need you to think about this…what you want. But right now, you need to rest." He rubbed the side of his head as his vision blurred. "And apparently so do I."

Realizing that the painkillers were beginning to take effect, she reached out and grabbed his hand as he started to stand. "Please stay."

He wanted to say no. He also wanted to take her into his arms and hold her tightly. His head swam and his eyes lost their focus as he looked at her.

"We're only resting, Buffy. Nothing more."

She gave him a slow nod and moved over, giving him enough room to lie down. He was able to kick his shoes off before the painkillers knocked him out. His head fell onto the pillow, his eyes closed in a drugged slumber.

Her trembling hand stroked the side of his face in a loving gesture before she turned her back to him and closed her eyes.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Willow cautiously made her way up the stairs, a soft smile on her face as she took in the two sleeping figures on the bed. Giles was spooned behind Buffy, his left arm draped over her and her head resting on his right.

She quietly made her way across the room and knelt beside the bed. "Buffy?"

"Mm?"

Willow smiled at the mumble and reached out, gently shaking her friend's shoulder. "Buffy?"

Buffy opened her eyes. "Will?"

"Hey." She whispered, not wanting to wake Giles. "I think we may have found your demon."

"Oh. Okay." She carefully lifted Giles' arm and slid out from under it.

As Buffy stood next to the bed and smoothed her wrinkled clothes, Willow smiled. "You two get things worked out?"

Buffy sighed sadly. "Not exactly. But, I'm hoping we took a few steps in that direction."

Willow narrowed her eyes. "Oh. I just thought…with the way he was holding you…"

"We didn't go to sleep that way. I think he's going to need some time. And he wants me to take some…to make sure he is what I want and need." Buffy met her friend's eyes and exhaled slowly. "I really hurt him, Will."

Willow squeezed Buffy's shoulder in a reassuring manner. "It'll all work out, Buff. I really believe that."

"I hope so." Buffy whispered as she looked down at the sleeping man. She blew out a deep breath and turned back to Willow. "So, the demon?"

Willow motioned towards the stairs and smiled. "Come on, I'll tell you all about him."

As they started down the stairs, Willow noticed that Xander wasn't at the table. She took the opportunity to grab Buffy's arm, halting her movement. Willow took a deep breath when Buffy turned questioning eyes to her.

"Why didn't you say anything? I mean…about the dreams or the maybe baby? To me?"

Buffy lowered her eyes and leaned against the wall. "I wanted to, but…God, I didn't want to tell Giles that way."

"By the look in his eyes when you told him, I'd say he'll forgive your bluntness about it."

"I hope so." Buffy responded quietly, glancing at the top of the stairs. "Still…I wish it had been more…something other than it was."

When Willow said nothing, Buffy met her eyes and cleared her throat. "And I did want to tell you. I almost did, but…"

"But?" Willow prompted gently when Buffy trailed off.

Buffy sighed heavily. "But, I was trying to protect you too. In my own, dysfunctional Buffy way. I thought if you didn't know, you wouldn't tell Giles…or try to stop me yourself…"

Willow snorted softly. "Yeah, as if I could stop you."

Buffy looked into her eyes and shook her head, her voice soft when she spoke. "But, you'd try. And if you couldn't, you would've told Giles so that he could try. And…that would've just put everyone in danger. So…instead of saying anything, I figured it would just be me."

Buffy shrugged a shoulder and exhaled deeply. "Stupid, huh?"

Willow nodded slowly. "Monumentally. But…we still love you." She smiled softly as Buffy looked back up the stairs again. "He still loves you too, you know."

Buffy offered her friend a smile, a small and slightly sad smile, but a smile nonetheless. She heard the bathroom door open and Xander's footsteps in the hallway.

"So…tell me about this demon?"

Willow wrapped her hand around Buffy's wrist and gently led her down the stairs.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He reached for her in his sleep, his eyes opening when his hand found nothing. He looked around, quickly realizing that the sun had gone down. The apartment was dark except for the soft light coming from a single lamp downstairs.

He climbed out of bed, thankful that the painkillers had done their job. He walked over to the railing and glanced down into the living room. The room was empty. Everyone had gone.

He sighed sadly and descended the stairs, debating on putting the kettle on to boil. Instead, he sat down at the table and pulled the ring out of his pocket. He stared at it for a few moments before placing it on the wooden surface and dropping his head into his hands.

"Giles?"

He turned towards the hallway to find Buffy standing there, concern etched on her face. He stood quickly.

"You didn't…you didn't leave."

She gestured down the hall. "Bathroom break. Will and Xander left a couple of hours ago. They found the demon in one of the books…"

He walked to her, eyes wide. He lifted a trembling hand and placed his palm on her cheek. "I…thought you had left…again."

"Oh God…Giles, I'm sorry. I didn't – "

He cut her off quickly, covering her mouth with his. He backed her against the wall as he kissed her hard, pushing his tongue into her mouth. She could feel his desperation in the union and returned the kiss fiercely.

Her hands wound in his hair as he lifted her, wedging her between the wall and his body. She wrapped her legs around his waist and groaned into his mouth.

He pulled from the kiss, leaving them both breathing heavily. His glistening eyes stared into hers.

"Do you love me?"

She nodded, determined not to break eye contact as she spoke. "I do, Giles. I love you so much…more than I ever thought possible."

He lifted his hand and gently stroked her cheek. "Don't leave me."

She swallowed hard at his whispered plea. "Take me back?"

"I never let you go, Buffy." He glanced down and inhaled deeply, gently gliding his fingers over her abdomen. "How late are you?"

"Six days."

He nodded slowly and stepped back, easing her body down his until she was standing in front of him. He seemed lost in thought for a moment and then cleared his throat.

"You, uh…you said that you've found something about the demon?"

"Willow did actually." She placed her hand on his chest and looked up into his eyes. "Are you more upset about the idea of me being pregnant than you said you were?"

"No." He answered quickly. "The thought of you…of us creating a child together…it doesn't upset me at all."

"Uh-huh." She responded uncertainly. "And this is why you look so…not exactly happy about it?"

"It's not that, Buffy." He sighed and shook his head. "This could very well be stress. You've been having prophetic dreams of your death. I…I'm worried about getting my hopes up, only to find out that…well…you're not."

She regarded him closely. "And if we find out that I am?"

He offered her a genuine smile and bent down to kiss her warmly. "Then I shall be an extremely happy man."

Before she could deepen the kiss, he pulled her towards the table and sat down in the chair he had vacated earlier. His smile faded, replaced with concern as he gestured to the chair next to him.

"For now…I'd like for you to tell me about the demon."

She nodded and sat down, pushing a book towards him. He took a deep breath and opened the book to the page where his leather bookmark was placed. His eyes narrowed and he looked up after reading the page.

"A Torjada? You're positive this is the demon that's been invading your dreams?"

Buffy nodded and glanced down at the picture. "Yeah, but…it says there that…"

"The Torjadan race is a peaceful one." His eyes shone with confusion as Buffy looked at him and nodded in agreement. "This is rather disturbing."

Buffy cleared her throat and reached over, placing her hand on his thigh. "Come with me tonight."

"Buffy, if I distract you – "

She interrupted him quickly. "One thing I didn't tell you about the dreams. You weren't there. And with it being a peaceful demon…maybe if you're there, then you'll see something that I've missed…" She gently squeezed his thigh. "Please Giles…I need you with me."

He covered her hand with his and gave her a nod. "You know that I will assist you in any way possible, Buffy. When should we leave?"

Buffy glanced at the clock and sighed. "We have a little over an hour."

He easily sensed her apprehension and tugged her towards him. "Come here."

She climbed onto his lap, facing him. He combed his fingers through her hair before pulling her tightly against his chest.

"I'll do anything I can to protect you."

"I know." She mumbled as she wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his shoulder. "I love you."

"I love you too, Buffy." He whispered softly.

They were quiet for a couple of minutes, content to hold one another. He swallowed thickly when he felt her lips brush across the side of his neck once, twice. He tilted his head slightly, moving his hands to her hips as her tongue tasted his skin on the third brush-by.

"Buffy…"

She slowly slid her tongue up his neck, pausing to place a warm kiss behind his ear before kissing his lobe and whispering into his ear. "If I don't survive – "

"You will." He interrupted softly, closing his eyes as her nails gently scratched the other side of his neck.

"Make love to me, Giles." Her tongue traced the shape of his ear as she shifted on his lap. "Please…make love to me."

He shuddered lightly as she gently nipped the top of his ear. He leaned forward with the intention of standing and carrying her to bed. She leaned back and smiled warmly as she shook her head.

"Here. Make love to me here."

"The bed…would be more…" He started, pausing when he looked into her eyes. "What is it, Buffy?"

She reached up and ran her thumb over his bottom lip. "Please…make love to me here."

She couldn't voice her reasoning, but he read it in her eyes. Fear. Fear that this would be the last time they would be together.

His hands held her tightly as she quickly worked on his shirt buttons. "Are you sure?"

She nodded and pulled his shirt from its tucked position. "Do you want me?"

"Always." He slid his hands under her blouse, pushing it up and over her head. He dropped it to the floor as he leaned forward, covering her lace-covered nipple with his mouth.

She moaned and arched her back, pushing her breast against his mouth. His tongue flicked against the hardened nub as he reached behind her and quickly unclasped her bra. He released her nipple and looked up at her as he pulled his open shirt off and tossed it to the floor.

She ground her core against him as she removed her bra, smiling softly as he involuntarily thrust upwards. She reached behind her, pushing the book out of the way as his mouth recaptured her nipple.

"God…Giles…"

His warm mouth suckled gently at her flesh as he lifted her and laid her across the table. He continued his tender assault, alternating between breasts as his fingers unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans.

His mouth moved down her torso, placing loving, open-mouthed kisses over her abdomen as he tugged her jeans and underwear down her legs. He stood up, breathing heavily as his eyes took in her nude form lying across his research table.

At that moment, he was sure he had never seen anything as beautiful before. Her softly spoken 'hey' caught his attention and he met her eyes.

"You okay?"

He smiled as he nodded, stepping forward when she reached for him. His right hand gently rubbed her thigh as she pulled the button free on his jeans before pulling the zipper down.

"I was just thinking…" He whispered as she reached into his open jeans and rubbed her palm against his erection.

He pushed the denim down his thighs, inhaling sharply as she sat up and slid his boxers down as well. She wrapped her fingers around the hardened shaft and stroked him slowly.

"What were you thinking?"

"That I've never seen anything as breathtaking as you…nude…stretched out across the table." He stated truthfully as his fingers brushed through the dampened curls between her thighs.

She trembled under his touch and stared into his eyes. "I'm not sure if I can handle foreplay right now…"

His eyes darkened as he brushed her hand away from his erection and stepped between her thighs. "Promise me something."

She nodded as he pulled her closer to the edge of the table. "What?"

He lifted his hand and cupped the side of her face as he gazed into her eyes. "Promise me that you won't keep things such as this from me again."

Her eyes glistened lightly. "Giles…"

He licked his lips, his thumb stroking her skin. "Promise me that you'll allow me to help you."

She leaned into his touch, whispering his name again as he lowered his voice. "Promise me that you'll not use the excuse of protecting me as justification for – "

His sentence remained unfinished as she leaned forward and kissed him deeply, a tear spilling from her eye as she poured all of her love for him into the kiss. When she slowly pulled from the kiss, she rested her forehead against his and lightly kissed the tip of his nose.

"I promise, Giles."

He sighed softly, hearing the sincerity in her voice and seeing it in her eyes. She gave him another warm kiss as she ran her fingers through his hair.

"I promise." She repeated with even more conviction.

He offered her a small smile. "Thank you."

As she started to respond, he reignited the kiss, slowly pushing her body down onto the table and leaning over her as she wrapped her legs around his hips. She groaned into his mouth as he slowly pushed his erection into her.

When he was fully embedded, he lifted his head and swallowed. "You will be victorious tonight, Buffy."

"Giles…" Her eyes fluttered as he began to rock his hips against her.

"Tonight isn't the night…tonight is our night. Your night…" He whispered as he peppered tender kisses along her neck. "You…you must believe…"

Her nails lightly scratched his back as she lifted her hips to meet each of his gentle thrusts. "I believe in you, Giles…"

He lifted his head and looked down at her. "Believe in yourself, Buffy. As I believe in you."

She moaned loudly as he quickened his pace. His hand tightened on her hip as he varied the depth of his thrusts, pushing her closer to orgasm with each movement. He pushed his upper body up, placing his free hand over her heart. He felt the muscle pound under his palm.

She opened her eyes and gazed up at him. She recognized a myriad of emotions in his eyes…love, desire, need, fear. She knew, at that moment, that she would do everything she possibly could to defeat the Torjada. More importantly, she _believed_ she could once again avert prophecy.

He smiled down at her when he saw the determination flicker in her eyes. "That's it…believe."

"Giles…oh, God…Giles!"

Her inner muscles spasmed violently around his thrusting cock as her orgasm crashed over her. He groaned, continuing his thrusts as her fluids bathed him. He leaned over her, moving his hand from her chest and laying it flat against the table next to her shoulder. He quickened his pace again, driving towards his own climax.

Her fingernails clawed at his back, pulling him closer as she screamed his name, her second orgasm immediately following her first. His cock thickened, the muscles in his back tensed as her name left his lips on a moan of ecstasy.

He pushed her over the edge once more, allowing himself to be taken over as well. He flooded her inner walls, their essences mixing together deep inside of her. She held him tightly as he slowly ceased his movement. His breath was hot against her skin as he panted heavily.

"I love you." She whispered as she fought for breath.

"You…I live for you, Buffy." He replied as he pushed himself up.

They moaned simultaneously as his softening flesh slipped from her. A glimmer of light caught his attention, a smile forming on his lips as he reached over with a trembling hand and picked the ring up from its resting place.

She shook her head slowly when she realized what he held. She covered her hand with his, curling his fingers over the ring as he narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"If you still want to ask me…wait until we come back home."

He smiled in understanding and leaned down to kiss her warm lips.

"You believe."

She nodded, smiling at his softly spoken statement. "I really do."

He swallowed and placed the ring on top of the open book before taking her hand and pulling her up. "We should…get dressed."

She rubbed his chest soothingly and leaned forward, quickly capturing his lips in a tender kiss. They shared a smile as he took a step back, awkwardly pulling up his boxers and jeans.

"Yeah, we should." She agreed, sliding from the table and picking up her discarded clothing. She looked up at him, her eyes shining brightly with love and excitement. "We have a demon to kill…and I have a prophecy to avert."

He smiled, slipping into his shirt as he watched her dress herself. He gave the ring another quick glance and took a deep breath.   
She believed…in herself and in him. And he believed in the fact that in a few hours the ring would be on her finger.

Buffy smiled as she watched him dress. Realizing that he had gotten lost in his thoughts, she reached out and lightly touched his arm.

"Giles?"

"Hm?" He replied absently, turning his head to look at her. "Yes?"

"Where did you go?"

He smiled and shook his head, reaching out to place his hand on her abdomen. "I'm here."

She covered her hand with his and sighed. "If I'm not – "

"We can try…if you'd like." He whispered softly. "If…if you're not."

"I'd like…I'd really like."

He exhaled slowly and gave her a slight nod before tilting his head towards the door. "We, uh…"

"Should go kill a Tornado…"

He chuckled softly, correcting her automatically. "Torjada."

She smiled brightly and glanced at the ring.

Belief was important…and she definitely believed.

 

~ End


End file.
